Aftershock
by CG07
Summary: A more detailed version of what happened after Khan was captured and when Kirk was revived. Part 2 up!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't anything in Star Trek.

* * *

Spock breathed an inaudible sigh of relief. The ship was flying and the crew was alive, things could have been worse.

The comm on the command chair was beeping and he quickly answered it.

Scotty's voice came through. "Engineering to Bridge. Mr. Spock"

"Mr. Scott." Spock said, bewildered.

"Sir," Scotty's voice broke through. "Ya better get down here. Better Hurry."

Everything hit him all at once. He didn't walk, he ran. He ripped off his restraints, and ran all the way down to engineering. Scotty was there waiting for him, he didn't look well. Scotty shook his head and gestured to the door.

Spock walked there, his heart getting heavier with every step he took, and it sank when he saw his worst fears being confirmed.

Jim was there, on the other side of the glass, being killed slowly by the radiation.

"Open it." Spock demanded, barely keeping the desperation out of his voice.

"The decontamination process isn't complete yet," Scotty explained, barely holding back his tears, "You'll flood the whole floor with radiation if we open it now."

Spock knew what that meant, Jim was going to die and there was nothing he could do about it.

He knelt on the floor so he could be face to face with Jim. Jim reached his hand up and pulled the lever that closed the room to the radiation wing. He could breathe again, but it was too late, the damage to his body was already done.

"How's our ship?" he asked Spock, still struggling to breathe.

"Out of danger." Spock replied, trying his best to be reassuring. "You saved the crew."

"Using what he wanted against him." Jim rasped, smiling despite the pain he was feeling. "That was a nice move."

"It is what you would have done." Spock said.

"And this is what you would have done." Jim replied. "It was only logical."

For a moment neither of them spoke, until Jim once again decided to break the ice.

"I'm scared Spock." He admitted, feeling small at that moment. "How do you do it? How do you choose not to feel?"

Spock shook his head, the tremble in his chin hardly noticeable unless someone took a good look, but his struggle was clear to anyone who knew him well.

"I do not know." Spock said, his voice breaking, "Right now I am failing."

Jim could feel himself slipping, he steeled himself wanting to say what needed to be said.

"I want you to know why I couldn't let you die." Jim said. "Why I went back for you."

Spock answered before Jim could get a chance to, a tear fell from his eye. "Because you are my friend."

Jim smiled, glad that Spock understood, and placed his hand against the glass. Spock followed suit, his fingers forming the Vulcan salute.

Jim did the same, forcing himself to smile, not wanting to upset his friend more than he already was.

_'I'm sorry Spock.'_ Jim thought, _'I'm sorry I can't be here with you guys anymore.'_

Those were his last thoughts. His body went slack and his eyes became vacant and his life finally ended.

Spock was frozen, The evidence was in front of him, but he didn't want to believe it, he could vaguely hear the cries of Scotty and Uhura behind him, but he couldn't bring himself to care. Jim was dead, the first person he ever dared to call friend was gone from his life.

His body was quivering as a whole array of emotions flew over him. There were no words to describe what kind of anguish he was feeling at this moment. He couldn't remember ever FEELING this strongly about something, not even when he had lost his planet and his mother. He could only decipher one emotion.

Rage. Pure, unadulterated rage.

He could only express his feelings in one word. "KHAAAAAAN!"

* * *

The USS Vengeance was in failure, it was plummeting to the Earth at ground breaking speed. 72 torpedoes guaranteeing the death of most creatures.

Most being the key word. And yet the enigma of the USS Enterprise and Starfleet was alive and breathing, hanging on to the handlebars of the Bridge.

'They will pay.' He thought, 'They will all fall.'

* * *

The decontamination process is done. The door opens and Spock rushes to take his body out. Scotty and Uhura were now standing behind him and Uhura let out a sob and covered her mouth. Spock cradled Jim in his arms. He took one last look at his face, the eyes that were once so full of life and laughter were blank and empty, it tore at Spock's heart. The grief was near unbearable.

He closed Jim's eyes and lifted him into his arms, holding him in a bridal carry and taking him out the door. He turned to Scotty and instructed him to get a gurney and a body bag. Scotty did as he was told, while Uhura just stepped closer to Spock. She looked at Jim's faces and pressed a palm to his cheek.

"I'm sorry." She whispered, "I'm so sorry…you were a good captain. You were a good man."

Meanwhile Scotty was speaking into his communicator and contacting Medical Bay.

"Engineering to Medbay." Scotty said.

"Scotty," McCoy said, "what's Jim done this time?"

"Leonard." Scotty began, "I'm so sorry."

McCoy froze, hating the hidden meaning behind those words. "Sorry for what exactly, Mr. Scott?"

"He's gone, Leonard." Scotty said, "Jim's gone."

The silence on the other end of the line spoke loud enough on what McCoy's thoughts were. A moment later McCoy's voice broke through, thick with emotion.

"I'm sending a team down now." McCoy said, "McCoy out."

Spock's grip had tightened, barely keeping himself together. It was too soon that Scotty returned with the medical team, already prepped to take him. Spock however made no move to put him down.

"Spock." Uhura said, after a moment. "It's time to let go…you have to let him go."

It pained her to say those words, just as it pained Spock to hear them. But he did as she said, very slowly and carefully he placed Jim into the bag, and allowed the team to zip him up and roll him away taking him to Medical. Scotty went with them, not having the heart to stay at the place where his captain died; he looked ahead and saw Chekov running toward them. His heart broke when he realized that he would have to tell him about Jim.

Uhura turned Spock around and held him. Spock for once, melted into the embrace and pressed his face into her shoulder, his body quivering with the sobs that threatened to come out, and tears gathering in his eyes that he dared not to release. Uhura was all too happy to cry for the both of them.

For a moment they simply held each other and cried.

"I know." She said through her tears, "I know; I'll miss him too."

When Spock stood up, his face was devoid of emotion, except for the eyes and Uhura knew him well, there was a smoldering, unparalleled rage showing in those eyes and it terrified her. There was a violent shift of the ship which caused them to lose their balance. They both ran up to the bridge and saw chaos.

"That was close!" Sulu said, struggling to take control of the ship. Chekov had run onto the bridge at that moment and reclaimed his old spot as Navigator.

"Scan that ship for any signs of life." Spock ordered.

"Nobody could survive that." Sulu objected.

"_He_ could." Spock spat out.

Sulu did as he was told and sure enough there was a single life scan showing. "I don't believe it he's alive."

The scan disappeared from the ship.

"Where'd he go?" Uhura asked.

"It looks like…" Sulu trailed off, "No way that's not possible."

"What's happening?" Uhura asked desperately.

"He just jumped 30 meters!" Sulu said. "He's blending with the crowd."

"Can you beam him aboard the ship?" Spock asked.

"He's moving too fast," Chekov said, "We can't get a lock, but we may be able to beam you down."

Spock looked to Uhura, his mind already set with what he was about to do, but he was compelled to seek her support.

"Go get him." Uhura urged, her voice tight and her eyes glistening.

Spock ran to the transporter room, and set his phaser from stun to kill. He readied himself for what he was about to do.

He was going to make sure that Khan didn't live another day.

* * *

Khan stopped in the middle of the courtyard and took a breath. He was surrounded by chaos and panic, it soothed him. A flash caught his eye, and he turned to see the all-too familiar lights from a transporter machine and in those lights, he saw Spock, with a look of murderous intent. Khan ran, not wanting to take his chances with the Vulcan.

Khan pushed civilians out of the way, not caring who he hurt, he ran through a window running up the steps, trying to get as far away from Spock as possible, but it was all for naught, Spock was just as, if not more determined to reach Khan. He noticed some hovercrafts being lifted, ready to take flight, he immediately jumped on top, using it as a means of escape.

Spock, with uncharacteristic daring, made the same jump as Khan gripping the edge of the craft and pulling himself up. Khan saw this and tried kicking him off to no avail. He then proceeded to grab Spock and throw him onto the hovercraft.

As Khan threw out his punches, Spock matched his every move and tried to block each hit as best as he could, finally he saw an opening and held Khan in a Vulcan nerve pinch. Khan screamed in pain, but stood his ground. After a few painful seconds he disarmed Spock's arm from his shoulder and threw another punch. He managed to grab his skull and tried to crush it just as he did to Admiral Marcus.

Spock placed his hand on Khan's face, this time he used a mind meld on him. He had pushed all his emotions into Khan's mind, he wanted to give Khan all of his pain and sorrow to make him feel just as he felt before he killed him.

Khan cried out in pain once again, and pushed Spock off once more. He used it as a distraction to escape the vehicle, he jumped onto another oncoming hovercraft, expecting to finally escape Spock. Spock was undeterred, he ran across the hovercraft and made the same jump.

The fighting continued.

* * *

The medical team had just come back from the radiation chamber, and they unzipped the bag confirming McCoy's worst fears.

Jim was dead.

His eyes were thick with the tears that he refused to release; he walked away from the still form of his best friend and sank into his chair placing a hand to his head.

A movement caught his eye and he turned to see…the Tribble. The dead Tribble. The dead tribble that was now currently breathing.

He turned desperately to the scanners, his eyes filled with hope, he got what he needed and ran to his communicator, but not before barking out orders.

"Get me a cryotube now!" McCoy barked, finally reaching his comm.

"McCoy to Bridge." He breathed out, "McCoy to Bridge, I need to get into contact with Spock immediately. I need to tell him that I need Khan alive…I think he can save Jim."

The crew on the Bridge all stiffened, only Uhura could maintain her composure long enough to answer the doctor's comm.

"This is Uhura," she said, in a barely steady voice, "I'm pretty sure that I speak for all of us when I say 'What the hell are you talking about?'"

"His blood!" McCoy said, "I don't know how, but something in his blood seems to have some type of healing power."

"McCoy," Uhura said, "Jim's dead. He's been dead for the last seven minutes, I know this is hard, but…

"Listen to me Goddammit!" McCoy snapped, "I'm a doctor, and I'm well aware of the facts that the longer a person dies, the less likely chance there is of reviving them, but this is Jim! If you want to save him then we need Khan! Now patch me through to Spock now!"

Uhura was silent for a moment, and dammit a part of her dared to hope. "I'm patching you through right now."

* * *

Spock was still fighting Khan. There was nothing else on his mind, his sole goal was to kill Khan, at any cost. Too much pain had been caused by this man, too many lives were lost.

Jim.

For him, Spock was doing this for him.

In the back of his mind, he could hear something, but he was too consumed by rage to pay attention.

"Dammit!" McCoy pounded his fist into the console. "He's not responding."

"His communicator could be damaged or fallen off." Sulu explained. "Can we beam them aboard the ship?"

"They are moving too fast." Chekov explained, "I can't get a lock on."

"Can you beam someone down?" Uhura asked.

* * *

Khan was starting to get the upper hand. He disarmed the Vulcan and managed to shove him to the surface of the hovercar, he kneeled to the ground and once again placed his hands on either side of Spock's head trying to crush him. Spock placed his hands on Khan's wrist trying to push him off.

At that same moment Khan felt a hit against the back of his head. He turned to find Uhura standing behind him at phaser point continuously shooting at him, in the back of his mind Khan pondered why she hadn't set her phaser to kill.

She had provided a distraction long enough for Spock to regain his footing and grab the lever that was on the surface of the car and hit Khan in the head as soon as he turned to face him. He then grabbed his arm and snapped it on his shoulder making sure to break it in two, then he flipped him over and Khan fell on his back with a thud. Spock got on top of him and punched him again. And again. And again.

He would keep punching him until he breathed no more.

He could vaguely hear Uhura calling out to him, but he still kept punching. Until she said the words that made him stop.

"He's our only chance to save Kirk!"

He looked up in surprise and saw that she was telling the truth. He turned back to Khan and threw a final punch which made him finally lose consciousness.

"How?" Spock asked.

"His blood," Uhura answered, "McCoy says that it can save him."

The hovercraft came to a stop, arriving at it's destination.

"Mr. Chekov." Spock said, needing no further explanation, "three to beam aboard."

"Aye, Commander." Chekov replied, pressing the necessary buttons, where McCoy as well as a fully equipped medical team on standby at the Transporter Pad.

Spock and Uhura were still on their kneeling position, where Spock held Khan in a Vulcan Nerve Pinch, keeping him unconscious.

"Doctor," Spock said, "I hope that you brought the most powerful sedative concocted."

"Don't worry Spock," McCoy said, pressing a sedative hypo into Khan's neck, "that should keep him out for a while. Now move people!"

His team had placed on the gurney, and they rushed to Medical Bay, with Spock, McCoy and Uhura leading the way, barking out orders for everyone to clear the way.

"Lieutenant Uhura has informed me that you can revive the Captain." Spock stated, keeping up his fast pace. "How is that possible?"

"Khan's blood," McCoy explained, "I don't know how, but it's got restorative abilities, I injected it on this Tribble that had died a few hours ago, and it just…came back."

"How can you be certain that it will work for the Captain?" Spock asked.

"I'm not," McCoy said, "but it's all we've got."

They had reached Medical Bay, where Carol had prepared McCoy's station, and handed him a hypo to extract Khan's blood.

"I'm going to need more than this Dr. Marcus." McCoy said, "I want to take as much blood as possible should something fail."

Carol complied and handed him several more, to which McCoy kept stabbing Khan with all the rage he could muster.

"Get Jim out of the cryotube." McCoy said.

When Spock saw Jim's corpse again, all of his sadness, and grief had returned tenfold. He steeled himself, determined to do whatever it took to bring his captain and friend back.

Carol had pressed a few buttons and slowly the lid of the cryotank hissed and opened. When the two male attendings moved to take Jim's body out, Spock immediately stepped forward and gathered Jim in his arms again, unwilling to allow anyone else to touch his friend. He walked over to the operating table and laid him down.

"Are you sure about this?" Spock asked again.

"No." McCoy answered.

"Do whatever you must." Spock said, stepping back to allow McCoy to do his work.

McCoy slowly laid the hypo against his friend's skin.

_'Please come back._' He thought, as he injected it.

Everyone waited with bated breath, but nothing happened. They were all hoping for an instant, miraculous resurrection, with Kirk opening his eyes, and opening his mouth to say one of his stupid one-liners.

Sadly that was not to be. After twenty minutes, with no response whatsoever, the crew's morale was destroyed.

"How long did it take for it to affect the tribble?" Sulu asked.

"An hour at most." McCoy responded, "But I thought…"

He couldn't finish the sentence, he didn't have to. They were all thinking the same thing, hoping for the same thing.

A miracle.

Suddenly Jim's eyes had snapped open, his mouth opening in a breathless gasp. His actions had caused everyone to jump in surprise including Spock.

After the intial shock, McCoy came into doctor mode.

"Jim?" he asked breathlessly, "Jim!"

At that moment, all of his monitors started to beep incessantly and Jim's eyes rolled to the back of his head as he collapsed into a heap and started to convulse.

The crew was immediately on their feet and asking questions all at once.

"What's going on?"

"What's happening?"

"Is he ok?"

"Everybody shut up!" McCoy roared. "Anybody who isn't medical needs to leave RIGHT NOW!"

While he barked orders to the medical team, Carol had ushered the Bridge Crew outside. The only person she couldn't move was Spock.

"Spock you need to get out of here now!" McCoy said.

Spock made no move to leave, "What is happening?"

"The blood's having an adverse effect on Jim." McCoy said, "He's rejecting the transfusion. _Shit!_ Everything's elevated, his heart rate, blood pressure, if we don't get it under control he'll crash, which is why I need you outside the Medical Bay!"

"Doctor…"

"Mr. Spock," Carol appealed to him, pulling him away towards the door. "I'm sorry but if you want McCoy at his very best then he can have no distractions, and that's all you are right now."

Spock's fists were clenched. He knew that Carol was right, but his human side refused to be pushed to the side while his friend was fighting for his life.

"Spock." Uhura said grabbing his hand and pulling him outside, "Let's go."

She finally succeeded and took him outside the medical bay. Meanwhile, the medical team was still working on keeping Jim alive.

"We may have to open him up doctor." A nurse said. "We don't know what the issue is here, but it's obvious he's rejecting the transfusion."

"We can't open him." M'benga argued, "His body absorbed a massive amount of radiation, if we open him up we risk contaminating the entire ship! Not to mention, we have no idea what this serum can actually do."

A continuous beep was heard, a flat line appearing on the monitor.

"Dammit we're losing him!" McCoy yelled, "Get me the paddles!"

Carol had given him the paddles, he charged them to 200 volts and pressed them against Jim's chest.

"Clear!"

Jim's chest shot up. No change with the beep.

"Again!" McCoy ordered, "Charge to 300 this time, Clear!

Again this action was met with no movement.

"Dammit Jim don't you do this to me!" McCoy said, "You're not getting off this easy, if I have to spend five years in this godforsaken tin can then you do too, now open your eyes!"

"Doctor McCoy." Carol began.

"One more time." McCoy said, "Just one more, charge to 400."

Carol reluctantly followed his orders, and McCoy prepared them again.

"Clear!"

They all looked to the monitors and sure enough, there was a beep.

"We got him back!" McCoy said, "We got him. M'Benga, push 50 cc's of anti-arrhythmia in him. We need to get his pressure down!"

All of the doctors got to work, and the Bridge Crew was waiting outside, feeling completely helpless.

* * *

Finally, after what seemed like hours, McCoy came out of the medbay doors, looking older than he ever had before. The crew immediately rushed to him, and he answered the question they were all poised to ask.

"He's alive."

The group released various cries of joy and were hugging each other, happy that against all odds their captain was brought back to them.

"He's not out of the woods yet." McCoy said, "I had to put him in a medically induced coma, we needed to push almost ever anti-rejection drug we had in stock. Not to mention, the radiation practically destroyed every organ in his body."

"But the transfusion was a success?" Spock asked.

"Yes," McCoy answered, "Although God knows that Jim never makes it easy."

"Why did his body reject the transfusion?" Spock continued, wanting to know every detail.

"Jim's always had a delicate constitution." McCoy explained, "His immune system is practically non-existent. He's allergic to most major medications, and Khan's blood was essentially a genetically-engineered serum created to fuel a perfect specimen. Who knows what type of drugs they used in order to make it that way."

"The captain will live?" Scotty asked, knowing that it was the only question everybody wanted to know the answer to.

"For now, yes." McCoy, "Like I said he's been put in a coma in order to give his body time to heal. Medically, I've done everything I could in order to keep him alive. The rest is up to Jim."

"Can we see him?" Uhura asked.

"Just for a minute," McCoy answered. "his body needs a lot of recovery time. I already contacted Starfleet Headquarters, and they're going to arrange a transport to the hospital as soon as possible. They're busy sending all of relief and rescue teams to the city, helping them recover from Khan's ship crash."

Needing no further encouragement, the group all but ran into the room to see their captain. He had a breathing mask on, as well as various tubes and wires attached to his body. He was as pale as death and if not for the steady beeping of the monitors they would not be able to tell if he was dead or alive.

McCoy sank into the chair once again, all of the day's events catching up to him. He looked to the group and frowned when he noticed that one of them was missing.

Where the hell was Spock?

* * *

It was quiet in the ship's brig. There was only one person manning the controls, but they didn't have much to worry about. Khan was just sitting quietly staring blankly ahead. His ears perked when he heard the almost silent footsteps of a certain Vulcan hybrid.

"I suppose I should feel honored that you grace me with your presence." he asked in a smug tone. "After our last meeting, I must admit that I am grateful for this glass between us."

Spock said nothing.

"And here I thought that Vulcans had no emotions." Khan pondered to himself.

"A common misconception of Vulcans." Spock said, "It is in fact the opposite, Vulcans feel just as if not more deeply than humans do."

"Yes, a fact I am very well aware of now." Khan said, remembering the beating he had received earlier, his arm was still healing. "Tell me, how is your captain?"

Spock stiffened at the mention of Jim.

"His well-being is no concern of yours." Spock stated tightly. His voice had a fierce protective edge.

"I disagree." Khan rebutted. "After all, it was my blood that saved him wasn't it? I would assume that is why you kept me alive, and the reason why Captain Kirk did not pursue me himself. Was his death an honorable one? Or did he face it with the fear and cowardice as Alexander Marcus did."

Spock didn't answer, instead he turned to the security guard, which ironically enough was Hendorff aka 'Cupcake'.

"Hendorff," Spock said, "Your services are no longer required, I will assume the duties of watching our prisoner."

Hendorff got the hidden meaning and he couldn't keep the smirk off his face.

"Yes sir." He said, when Spock turned his back, Hendorff reached over and shut down the cameras that connected to the brig. He and Jim had started off on the wrong foot, but in the past year the had become close. He took threats to his captain personally. "Oh, I should probably inform you that the security cameras connected to this area are being shut off by maintenance. They'll be back online in about two, three hours top.

"Thank you, Lieutenant." Spock said, leveling his gaze on the prisoner, but Khan refused to be intimidated.

"Tell me Mr. Spock," Khan said, "How does it feel to be completely helpless to save the people you love? How does it feel when what you cherish most is taken from you?"

Spock's fists were tightened behind his back. He raised a hand in order to create an opening in the wall and slowly stepped inside.

"What are you going to do now, Mr. Spock?" Khan mocked, "Beat me to a bloody-

He didn't get to finish that sentence as Spock punched him to the ground. Khan fell to his hands and knees, Spock grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and re-broke his arm on his shoulder,and did the same to the other. Khan cried out in pain, but he was powerless to defend himself. He fell to the ground with a thud, but Spock was relentless. He kneeled over and repeatedly punched Khan over and over, just as he did on the hovercraft.

"You know nothing of what I feel." Spock growled. "You know not what you took from me."

He emphasized each word with a punch. Even though Khan was in immense pain, it didn't stop him from giving Spock a smug grin.

"I see now what pushes you to break bone." he said. "How interesting that you care so much for a man who is simply your commanding officer."

Spock delivered a particularly hard punch when he said that.

"You hurt my friend." Spock hissed, "You are the cause of his suffering, you are the reason he was forced to make the ultimate sacrifice."

Khan spit out his blood, "Perhaps, but I am also the cause of his miraculous return. It is my blood that will flow in his veins. I did what you could not, I have saved your Captain, or is that what vexes you so? The fact that I could save him and you could not."

With a roar Spock threw him against the glass wall, making sure to smash Khan's skull in as hard as he could, causing the reinforced glass to crack.

Khan gave a taunting laugh, "You fail to realize that with my blood, he will have a constant reminder of his failings. He will now be forever haunted by my memory."

Spock punched him in the stomach, causing Khan to feel winded. While he was gasping for breath, Spock slammed his knee into his mid-section, breaking four ribs in the process. Then he threw him to the ground again.

"You will never harm him again." Spock vowed.

The beating continued.

* * *

Spock walked into the Medbay doors two hours later, his eyes immediately seeking out his captain, he all but ran to his side the moment he laid eyes on him. Jim had various tubes and wires attached to him, the most prominent being the breathing tube he had down his throat. Spock had been so focused on Jim that he failed to hear McCoy's footsteps.

"Where have you been?" McCoy asked. "I figured that I would have to use at least a dozen hypos to get you away from him."

"I had certain duties to attend to as my position of Commander." Spock explained. "Has there been any change?"

"No," McCoy said, "No change whatsoever, but in this case that's probably a good thing. He's not getting any worse, so all we can do now is hope that he gets better. Starfleet Medical's coming to transfer him to the main hospital in about twenty minutes."

"I see," Spock said, "I must…commend you doctor. Your actions and quick thinking saved the captain's life."

Leonard looked down and was surprised to see that Spock's hands had green bruises. "What happened to your hands?"

Spock stiffened and softly replied, "Nothing of consequence Doctor, they should heal within a few days."

McCoy raised a brow, but made no comment as he grabbed another hypo, pressing it against Spock's arm."Here, this should make the bruises go away within the hour. I should probably to take a look at your hands to make sure nothing's broken."

"I assure you doctor, they are not." Spock said, "Vulcan bone structure is much stronger than a human's."

"Fine whatever you say," McCoy grumbled, not bothering to argue with him. "I need to get to the brig, I need to make sure that Khan is out cold before Starfleet takes him into custody."

"That will not be necessary doctor." Spock said, "I have just returned from the brig and I assure you that Khan is incapacitated at the moment."

McCoy froze and looked at Spock in a strange calculating way. Spock gave no indication that he noticed McCoy's staring.

"That's where you've been this entire time, haven't you?" McCoy asked.

"As I have said doctor, as the Commander of this vessel I have many responsibilities to attend to." Spock said, giving no further information.

"Right." McCoy said. "Keep an eye on him will you?"

"I assure you Doctor, I will." Spock said, keeping his gaze on Jim.

* * *

"Jesus Christ Spock, what the hell did you do!" McCoy demanded.

It was well past midnight, the day going by quickly. Jim had been transferred to Starfleet's main hospital. Spock kept a vigil watch over Jim, the entire time, not leaving his side once. He was currently on the floor with his legs crossed as he attempted to meditate.

"To what are you referring doctor?" Spock asked, not moving from his meditative state.

"I'm referring to the bloody mass of flesh and bone I found when I examined Khan." McCoy said, "Two shattered ulnas and radius', four broken ribs, a dislocated shoulder, displaced kneecaps, and multiple fractures in his skull! It's a miracle he's alive!"

"Doctor there is no such thing," Spock replied, "And if there were, that is not an adequate description of Khan's survival."

"I also noticed that over three hours of surveillance in the brig disappeared." McCoy noted. "Right after Jim's surgery."

"That is an issue for maintenance staff to handle." Spock said.

McCoy said nothing, all he could do was stare at Spock with an almost awed reverence.

"You really care about him don't you?" he asked softly, not expecting Spock to answer.

Spock actually opened his eyes and turned to look at McCoy. His gaze was answer enough.

McCoy sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Listen, Starfleet's going to want a detailed version of what went down. They're going to want to see you as soon as possible, I could probably buy you a couple of days, tell them that you're in some type of healing trance and you can't be interrupted. You can stay here."

"That would be most appreciated doctor." Spock said, standing up, and settling into a chair next to Jim's bed.

"Don't do this to yourself Spock." McCoy said. "This wasn't your fault."

"I failed him." Spock said quietly, "I failed my duties as his First Officer."

"No you didn't Spock." McCoy urged, "You took control of the situation and handled it the way Jim would have. He would have been proud."

"I let him die." Spock whispered, tightening his fists on the sheets.

McCoy was brought back to the mission at Nibiru, recalling himself saying those same words to Jim.

"There was nothing you could have done Spock," McCoy said, "If you had opened that chamber, we all would've been dead. There was no way you could have saved him without risking the rest of us."

"He would have found one." Spock continued.

McCoy said nothing, opting to squeeze Spock's shoulder, "Don't dwell on that now. Try to get some rest, you're going to need it."

He left the room, knowing that Jim couldn't be in safer hands.

* * *

Yes, I know that people are writing these types of fics, but I just felt like writing one of my own. I hope you guys liked it! Sorry if Spock is a little OC, I tried to keep him as in character as possible, but trust me he's hard to write.

I also have an extra chapter. A little platonic fluff piece between Spock and Jim after he gets out of the hospital! If you're interested in seeing that leave a review!


	2. Chapter 2

A little warning the characters may be slightly OC.

* * *

Spock was sitting in a lounge chair, reading from his PADD. It had been exactly 10 days since Jim had woken from his coma. McCoy was insistent that as a contingency to his release he was not to be left alone, so naturally Spock volunteered to have Jim stay at his apartment. Jim reluctantly agreed, not wanting to spend another day in the hospital. Spock made sure to do all that was necessary so that Jim was as comfortable as possible. He set the temperature to human standard, even though it made him colder than usual, which was why he was currently wearing a thick black turtleneck and warm brown pants.

Jim was asleep in Spock's bedroom, even though he tried to protest. He insisted that the couch was fine, but Spock was firm with his position, stating that Vulcans did not need as much sleep as humans, and Jim's body still needed time to recover.

His thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a loud piercing scream, he leapt from his chair and ran to the bedroom. He saw that Jim was thrashing about in his bed. He seemed to be experiencing a nightmare.

* * *

_He had failed his mission. He didn't get to the core in time and the ship was going down. The worst part was that he was trapped behind the glass and he couldn't help his crew._

_Both Chekov and Scotty were caught in the explosion of a boiler. They were being burned alive._

_Sulu was being electroculted by a broken cable that had been sparking all around the floor._

_Uhura was impaled by some shrapnel in her throat. She gasped for breath while grasping at her throat. She fell to the floor with a thud._

_The ship had cracked and split apart, crew members were sucked out of the ship. Bones and Carol among them. Bones had resisted, grabbing a pipe and hanging on for all he was worth, he grabbed onto Carol too. He and Jim locked eyes, and it broke Jim's heart to see the pure fear they held, and then he was sucked away too._

_And Spock…_

_Jim looked around desperately, and much to his horror saw Spock and Khan fighting. Like he did with Marcus, he grabbed Spock by both sides of his head and crushed his skull in._

_"NOOOOOOOO!" Jim screamed out in horror._

_Khan looked to Jim, and had an evil grin on his face. He walked slowly to Jim, his hands dripping with Spock's green blood. He kneeled to face him._

_"It's all your fault." He said, "You led them to their deaths. Pike was right…you're not fit to be in the chair."_

_Then Jim felt a pressure on his body, and he felt something shaking him._

_Jim screamed in horror and threw his arms out, trying to fend off whatever was shaking him, only for his wrists to be caught in a strong grip._

"-aptain, Captain…**Jim**!" Spock's voice called out.

Jim finally stopped resisting when he saw that it was only Spock.

"Spock! We have to get away!" He rambled, grabbing Spock's arms. "He's coming! Khan's coming! We need to get the crew off the ship now!"

"Jim, we are not aboard the Enterprise," Spock explained patiently, "We are in my quarters, do you not remember?"

Jim thought back for a moment and it all came back to him. He had just been discharged from the hospital, and Spock volunteered to have him stay in his quarters. He looked down and saw that instead of the white scrubs the hospital provided for him, he was wearing a gray t-shirt and red flannel pajama pants.

"Khan?"

"He is in stasis right now Captain." Spock said, his voice getting slightly colder.

"So everybody's okay?" Jim asked, not releasing his grip on Spock's sleeve.

"Yes Captain." Spock said. "All is well."

It was those words that caused Jim to break. His face crumpled as he finally allowed himself to release all the emotions he had been holding back since the death of Pike. He latched onto Spock and began crying into his neck.

Spock jumped back startled by his friend's actions. His entire stature had stiffened, not being used to this type of situation. Then he looked down and seeing Jim in such a state…troubled him.

Deciding for once to listen to his human instincts. He wrapped his own arms around Jim in turn and pulled him closer to his chest, holding him securely in his arms.

"It is alright Jim." He said, "Everything is alright now."

"I'm sorry," Jim gasped out, "I'm sorry Spock, I'm so sorry for everything. It's my fault, it's all my fault."

"No Jim." Spock argued. "You are not responsible for Khan's actions or that of Admiral Marcus, you performed to the best of your ability and you succeeded, you saved over three hundred lives."

Jim shook his head, "People died on my watch Spock, people died because of the decisions I made!"

"You did not kill those people," Spock insisted, "and every single person aboard the Enterprise knew the risks of being aboard a starship and accepted them."

"They were my responsibility Spock." Jim said, "I was the captain and I let everyone down. If I had listened to you or Bones, or Scotty, none of this would have happened."

Spock didn't know what else to do, so all he could do was hold him and try to comfort him as best as he could. He began to rock back and forth slightly to calm him down.

"Everything is alright Jim." Spock said, "Khan is back where he belongs, he can cause no further damage, and while you couldn't save the lives of those lost in space, your bravery allowed you to save the lives of the rest of the crew in our arrival to earth, at the cost of your own life."

Jim shuddered, remembering his time in the radiation chamber.

"I was so scared Spock." Jim sobbed. "I didn't feel brave, I was terrified. I felt so helpless and alone. I know that you were there on the outside but I was in the chamber by myself and it hurt...it hurt so much. I couldn't…I couldn't-"

He trailed off and buried his face in Spock's shoulder as if trying to hide away from the memories.

Spock tightened his grip, struggling with his own memories of that particular moment. He focused on calming Jim down and started to rub soothing circles around Jim's back as well as the back of his head, carding his fingers through his hair. He remembered his mother doing this to him whenever he was emotionally distressed as a child.

"Hush Jim." Spock said, "It is over. You will never have to experience such fear again, not so long as I breathe."

After a while Jim's tears and sobbing subsided, but he never released his grip on Spock's shirt.

"Spock?" Jim looked up at his friend in a pleading manner. "Could…could you stay here tonight...please? I don't want to be alone right now."

"Of course Jim." Spock said. "I would be more than happy to."

He maneuvered them so that they both lied on the bed, next to each other. Spock rested Jim's head slightly against his shoulder, and kept his arm around Jim's back. He coudl still feel Jim's frame shaking slightly and the fact that he was a touch telepath allowed him to feel the lingering fear Jim held. While it pained Spock to see Jim so visibly upset, it also showed him just how much Jim valued his friendship; the fact that he was allowing himself to break down in front of Spock's person showed that he had complete trust in him and Spock wasn't going to allow that trust to be misplaced.

"Rest Jim." Spock murmured, "There is nothing for you to fear, I will not allow anything to happen to you. You are safe with me."

"Thank you Spock." Jim said, fisting his fingers in Spock's shirt. "Thank you for being here."

"I will always be here for you Jim." Spock said, "Always."

Jim finally started to feel at ease and soon enough, his eyes began to droop and he eventually fell asleep.

Spock on the other hand was wide awake. For a while he just stared at Jim's sleeping form, making sure that he was safe. He may never admit it aloud, but the past month had been a terrifying experience for Spock. It nearly destroyed him, not knowing if Jim would live or die. It astounded him how much had changed, just a year ago Jim was his worst bane, now he was his closest friend and confidant.

He remembered the words of his future self, he spoke of a friendship that would define the both of them. At the time he didn't know what he meant, and Spock found it hard to believe that he could ever feel anything besides indifference towards Kirk. But now...he honestly couldn't imagine a world without James Tiberius Kirk, and the fact that he almost had to terrified him more than he could say.

He made sure to keep one hand on Jim's head while the other rested around his back. Jim seemed to be comforted by his presence and after everything he had been through, Spock wasn't going to deny him that peace no matter how uncomfortable he felt. Although deep down, he knew that he needed the contact as much as Jim did. Having Jim so close to him proved that he wasn't dead, that he was alive and breathing.

Jim shivered in his sleep and nestled closer to the warm body next to him, Spock complied by wrapping his arms more tightly around Jim and keeping his head tucked under his chin, absentmindedly running his fingers through Jim's hair. He couldn't change the past; he couldn't bring Admiral Pike back, he couldn't stop Marcus from setting Jim up with a suicide mission and he couldn't stop Jim from stepping into the radiation chamber.

But he could make sure Jim had a restful sleep tonight and that's exactly what he intended to do.

* * *

Thoughts?


End file.
